The Soccer Season, Anew

Time for another soccer season to begin. I was quickly reminded this past weekend of how quickly we forget the skills required to survive in the travel soccer quagmire. The rules and checklists are:

1. Plan most Friday nights for driving
2. Pack your cooler and groceries with beer (first and foremost), bagels, bananas, ham and cheese, snacks, gatorade
3. Always check voicemail, then check it again 10 minutes later for updates
4. Pray for rain, so you do not have to play the 7 am game.
5. Check into the hotel and pray more for something other than the Bates Motel
6. Check voicemail again
7. Pry your child out of bed
8. Show up for the game, on-time (bring a book, you are one hour early)
9. Cheer (positive only for the kids, no coaching from the sidelines)
10. Lunch at an acceptable deli sandwich place
11. Show up for the game, on-time (book or paper, again)
12. Cheer
13. Dinner at an acceptable restaurant (no fried foods)
14. Repeat once (miss church most times)
15. Drive home

Here we go again. Hope to see my wife in 7 or 8 weekends.

Private Speech

I put a blog entry in my business blog that relates the private speech, which impacts business, personal and work-life balance. Thought that I would link it here.

The Creative Process

Had some interesting thoughts and personal revelations, this past weekend, on the creative process. You always hear the phrase that art is for the artist. I never really and truly understood this until working on this blog, youtube video and flickr photos. These creative outputs (you can judge the level of creativity :-)) are fun to work on, even when no-one reads the blog, reviews the video or looks at the photographs. I enjoy the output, for the sake of the output.

Anyway, it is late in the day for too many deep thoughts.

The Surf Slide

A totally fun post. A subset of our family visited Williamsburg this past President's weekend. During the trip, the kids and I (Maureen was back in Colonial Williamsburg) went to a water park at the Great Wolf Lodge in the area. They had one ride which mimic'ed a surf ride that was an absolute blast. No great pictures to share, but a wild ride. Great for the thrill seeker in you.

Marty makes Varsity Soccer Team

Good news for Marty. He made the varsity soccer team as a sophomore. His position is backup keeper. The current keeper is a Senior.

This was an interesting choice for him. He could play junior varsity and start or play varsity and ride the pine for the season. In the end, he chose to get the exposure to the higher level of play available at the varsity level (at least in practice). It is much better to be the small fish in the big pond.......

I am having interesting emotions as a parent. We have always supported our children and left the decisions like this to them. I am proud that he made the right choice. I am also happy that he has made the varsity, even though I would be perfectly happy supporting him in JV. We will see if there are opportunities for him to play.

Added material - Interesting Ritual for Knox Catholic Soccer. New members get their hair cut in weird ways, then have one day of practice and then buzzed. Marty looks really weird now.....

Tim on All-KISL Team

Congratulations to Tim, our second son, for a starting spot on the All-KISL team for basketball. Tim plays point guard for the Sacred Heart Eagles and had a great season, along with the whole team! Great job, Tim.

Conversations with Children and Employees

I am struck by a comparison between children and employees. As a parent, there are often conversations which are difficult, but required. The purpose is, through love, to help your child see the need to correct actions or change on-going behaviors. As a manager, the same conversations are required, at times, with your employees. Though love is not the usual reason given in a business situation, it should be the same motivating factor.

Reversing the comparison, the same rules for a manager, when holding these conversations, holds true for the conversation with a recalcitrant child. Calm, yet firm, conversation is the method, with just enough emotion to express the seriousness of the situation. Establishing the position of judge is crucial, and examples of behavior or changes in expected output are also required. Having a solid action plan is essential. Lastly is follow-up, with clear rewards or consequences.

I have found that these conversations with employees are far easier, as the emotional connection is more distant. I also, though, firmly believe that these conversations are far more important with your children. The long term emotional exposure is far greater.

Charit Creek Lodge

Charit Creek Lodge. The name and place houses a collection of experiences for me, both good and bad. I have had some of the most wonderful experiences and at least one of my worst mistakes in personal relationships. Much like life overall, it is an amalgamate of all of these experiences in my mind.

This weekend, we had another Cub Scout trip to the Lodge. The Cub Scout trips are the usual genesis of a trip, as we have had a group visit the lodge for the last eight years. Another great trip this weekend. The most memorable part for me was the clarity of the night sky; stars, satellites, meteorites, the Milky Way. It was absolutely beautiful and not too cold for the viewing.

As for the mix of memories and experiences, the visit to Charit Creek has always been welcome. The absolute best experience was the trip where the temperature was below ten Fahrenheit and had been for over a week. The creek was well frozen over and the scouts and parents had a great time skating on the ice. For Tennessee, it was a unique experience.

This same trip also led to one of my personal mistakes, the kind that you relive in your mind and wish to relive for real. One of the other father's and I had a run-in, after the trip. Suffice it to say that I handled the situation poorly and damaged a relationship. More in another post, at another time. It is funny how often the best and worst situations (at least in your own mind) are juxtaposed.

Back to the good (I am a hopeless optimist), Charit Creek Lodge and the Big South Fork area will always represent this mix of real life experiences, with the good and wonderful experiences far outweighing the one's you wish to relive and redo. The Lodge bunkhouse, hiking and visits with good friends are great.

Randomness and Life

I am always fascinated by the view of life as a random machine. By this I mean that many factors of life are exposed to random effects, which can leave us feeling like small particles suffering from Brownian motion. Life's many aspects can be viewed as a string of independent (or dependent, based on your beliefs) probability functions.

In the view on success, education, clear thinking, and prudent behaviors all simply increase the probability of success. They do not guarantee it. Evidence to these facts is available. Observe simply that there are a lot of smart, talented people who are not remarkably wealthy nor overtly successful. Also observe that there are people who are successful who are not remarkably bright. Randomness works both ways. Now, taken over the entire spectrum of humanity, the probabilities are spread and show that successful people are usually bright and unsuccessful are usually not, but that simply reinforces the probability viewpoint.

Randomness in life also is manifest in the actions and interactions of our lives on the planet. The car wreck, exposure to sickness, choice of small action which cascade to disaster all can show the interaction of randomness with our lives. The positive of this randomness is shown in avoidance of tragedy.

I have to say that I am most certainly not negative on the random effects in life. I truly believe that, without the random interactions and their effects on life, we would live in an exceedingly boring existence. I encourage us all to recognize the randomness as valuable, do our best to work through the negative effects, make the best of our situations and keep chugging. What else are we to do?